Dating Detox: Necessary Measures for a "Serial Dater"

I am sick of dating.  I probably shouldn't share this with the world, but what the heck.  I need a break from dating.  I got out of a relationship in March 2013 and the past 8 or so months have included countless great dates, some god-awful dates, and a couple almost relationships (you know what I mean...hopefully).  I know it sounds weird, but I meet at least one person every time I go out or through friends.

I've dealt with egotistical, emotionally unavailable guys...clingy, almost too-perfect guys...great, balanced guys who just didn't understand me...etc.  I'm sure those guys also have some good and some, ahem, constructive things to say about me as well.  All that it inevitably boiled down to was that we were not a good match. 

    

I tried to remain hopeful and not affected by previous people, but it got to the point recently when I was just like "I can't do this anymore".  I need a time-out.  I want to clear my head, focus on myself, and figure out what exactly I even want.  

This is the first post of at least 2 posts on this subject.  I'm definitely going to write on this again once I'm done with my detox.  I might write another one if I feel so inclined and inspired throughout the process.  I'm going to start with 30 days off.  A couple of my best friends (and maybe even my mom) think I should give myself even more time off.  I'll do my own trial period and let you know if I decide to extend it.

Body and Soul Dating Detox

If you're interested in doing a detox of your own click the above link for some tips. 

Here's my detox plan over the next 30 days:

1. No dates. If someone asks me out they will have to wait.

2. Learn how to do at least one new thing. I want to learn how to do basic sewing.

3. Spend time 3 days a week to meditate/free write for at least 15 minutes.

4. Have carefree fun.

<3 

How To End Things When You're Casually Dating

Sex And The City Clip:  Berger breaks up with Carrie on a Post-it.

It's not easy to break things off when you've only been out on a few dates.  It's especially difficult if the person has been really genuine and has been wonderful to you every time.    

Sometimes, it's just not there.  Maybe it's an attraction thing or maybe your personalities don't mesh well. Or maybe you've been on other dates and just want to see where those go instead.  It really sucks when someone doesn't feel the same way about you. Believe me I've been on that side many times. That's why I think it's so difficult to end things.  I know how bad it can hurt and how confused you can feel.  

Did I do something wrong?  

Why doesn't he/she like me?  

Am I not good enough?

If you are a good person and a respectful person you'll be cognizant of the fact a person may feel this way after breaking it off.  

Here are some things to keep in mind when breaking it off:

-Be Direct. Tell them that you don't see it going further for _______ reason.  Sometimes I don't have a specific reason or the reason is sensitive so I will say something along the lines of "I don't have strong romantic feelings for you."

-Be Kind. This is not the time to tell them everything you dislike about them.  The only time I'll give constructive feedback is if the person asks if they could have done something differently.  Every person is different though--sometimes it's just not a good fit.  I don't want someone to change because of me.

-Be Final. Once you have broken things off make it clear that this is it.  It's not fair to assume the other person will be okay with just being friends.  Maybe they will, but you can't assume that.  Do not contact them because you're lonely, bored, need a confidence booster.  You broke it off.  Let them move on.

I've written about getting my heart broken so it was about time that I wrote about the other side.  

It's not an enjoyable experience.  

It doesn't make me feel like a better person. 

However, if I follow the above guidelines I can at least feel like I'm being respectful of the person's time and feelings.  The times guys have just casually drifted away have caused me to lose respect for them.  You never know the effect your ounce of respect will have in the future.  Maybe you'll start dating a mutual friend of the two of you or you'll end up at the same company.  You don't want to burn bridges or cause disdain because you're afraid to have an uncomfortable conversation.

On a brighter note, I hope everyone enjoyed the holidays! :)

It's Cold Season! Here Are Some of the Best and Worst Treatments!

"It's going around".  What exactly is "it"?  I don't don't know for sure, but I think people use it to describe the common cold.  Some people I work with had it last week and I got it just in time for the weekend. I don't think anyone is really "good" at being sick, but I am horrible at it.  I can only rest for so long no matter how crappy I feel because I get so bored!  

I was especially bummed this weekend because I had 2 Halloween parties that I was going to miss.  After sleeping for 10 hours straight I decided to stop by one of them in a "sick person" costume.  

I'm drinking a glass worth of Merlot from a Thermaflu bottle.  

I do not encourage people to drink cough medicine in this manner.

It was an excuse to be social and also carry around a box of tissues in my bathrobe. It also left me bedridden the rest of the weekend.  No room for me to get bored again!

So now for some of the Best and Worst Treatments...

(Please know that I am not a doctor, nurse, or any other type of medical professional).

Best Treatments  (Can be summed up with this acronym below)

REST: Relax, Eat, Sleep, Treat
(Totally just made that up, but I like it and am kind of proud of myself.)

RELAX- Keep as calm as possible--Stress will only weaken your Immune system. 

EAT- I use this as my excuse to eat Ice Cream, Popsicles, and Chicken Noodle Soup (hydration).  Also, pair your food with lots of water! 

SLEEP- Even if you need to take some Nyquil to knock you out (responsibly).  This sort of helps you with all of the mouth breathing.

TREAT- Without my Mucinex D or Sudafed I am a big baby.  Also treat your nose by blowing it.  Cough drops can also be pretty soothing.

Worst Treatments (Again, see acronym below)

DIVE: Drink, Ignite, Vacuum, Eat
(I have no idea where this came from.  I came up with that first clever acronym and just decided this needed one as well.)

DRINK- This is referring to booze not water (drink lots of water).  Alcohol might help you forget about your symptoms for a short period of time, but then you'll wake up feeling even worse!

Ignite- "Only you can prevent forest fires."  Stay away from any kind of smoke.  It's already hard enough to breathe with that stuffy nose!

Vacuum- You're sick!  Someone else should be doing the cleaning.  Get back in bed!  Oh, you live alone?  Just don't invite anyone over.  No one wants your germs anyway.

Eat- This is a repeat because girrrl (or boyyy) you are sick and sedentary.  You don't need to be shoving down all of that food.  Shove down water with a side of food. Lol. 

That's the best advice I have!  I went to brunch on Sunday and ordered tea with honey because I heard that's good for colds.  Unfortunately, I hate tea so I only took one sip.  I do feel slightly better today.  Maybe give it a try...just in case. ;)

I apologize if anyone gets a cold from me.  Sharing is caring!

The Halloween Costume Decisions..."I'm a Mouse...DUH!"

Ohhh the question many of us think about every year.  

Some people think about it months in advance.  

What scary...funny...shocking...ironic...slutty (NOT ME Mom!)...err... 

Halloween costume should I wear this year?!

Getting Political Costume

You know some version of this will be out there this year.  The government shutdown happened way too close to Halloween for some "clever" lads to NOT wear something of this sort. I created this image by the way.  I too, am clever.  Hold on let me brush that one off my shoulder...the donkey that is.  LOL. 

Okay, okay, I made a promise to myself I wouldn't get political on here.

Harajuku Girl Costume

I wore this costume one year when I wanted to get creative and not go with the typical promiscuous female costume.

Harajuku Girls is a term to describe women and teenage girls in Harajuku (Tokyo, Japan) who wear a style of clothing that originated in the street culture of major cities in Japan, (i.e. Tokyo and Osaka). Learn More Here!

Castaway Couple Costume

("Chuck" played by Tom Hanks and "Wilson" played by Volleyball)

Who could forget the love between Chuck and Wilson?  I don't know when I cried more in a movie--when Rose has to let the frozen Jack go in "Titanic" or when Chuck loses Wilson to the ocean in "Castaway".  This could be a great couples costume or one between secure friends.  You'll have to fight over who gets to be who though!

French (people) + Kiss (the rock band) = 

French Kiss Costume

I...Wanna Rock And Roll...All Niiiight...And Party Every Day, s'il vous plaît?  

This costume gives the political costume a run for its money in the "clever" realm.  

This could be a great group costume.  

It could be even cooler if you make crepes and give them out.  

Friends of mine: please do this!  Mmmm...Crêpes.

Princess Costume

(Notice the reuse of the pink tutu)

I wanted to wear a costume that was form-fitting and flirty, but still not in that "lingerie" category.  I give myself an D+ for creativity (I didn't give myself an F because I pulled all of these items separately).  You CAN wear something cute, but not slutty. 

(I know Dad, it's still too much.)

"The Shining" Twins Costume

I started looking for "scary" costumes on the internet and found some nasty, foul, gross, stomach-wrenching costumes.  This is as bad as it gets on here.  I sometimes go back to my old posts and I really don't care to see some of the things I found again.  

If you're a twin, congrats!  You only need to find matching outfits and some fake blood.  If you're not twins, you'll need to put more effort in make-up and proportions, etc.  It still seems fairly easy.  You might want a wig if you don't have matching hair color.

The Tan Mom Costume 

I'm going to take a wild guess and say you read "Perez Hilton" regularly if you wear this costume.  I'm not hating...so do I.  

If you're tanorexic like I used to be, this one won't require much makeup.  

Grab a baby doll and cover it with brown paint and you're good to go.  

Happy tanning!

Cop Costume

I tried this on at the halloween store the other day just to see what it would be like to wear a typical female costume: one piece and revealing.  I included it on here because it's part of the majority, but I did not buy it.  I just awkwardly took a selfie in the dressing room.  I like pulling stuff together on my own.  (And no, I'm not a hipster.)

Whatever you decide to go with...Enjoy!  

And have a very HAPPY HALLOWEEN!

Six of My Favorite Movie Funnies!

Wedding Crashers

When Todd peeks out of the closet I cannot stop laughing.

Zoolander

 Derek Zoolander's mermaid face is priceless.

Mer-man, Mer-MAN! 

Office Space

Who says white guys can't rap?  

Hangover

A whole assortment of funny moments in this video.  

Who let the dogs out?

The Big Lebowski

No one (bleeps) with Jesus.

Anchorman

Variety of funny moments to choose from.  

And you ate the whole wheel of cheese? How'd you do that? Heck, I'm not even mad; that's amazing.


I haven't had much time to write, but I wanted to post something for you all.  Enjoy!  Pray that I get some more inspiration to write.  :)

7 Types of Drunk People You Know

1. Political Patsy

This person is likely already very hardheaded when it comes to politics.  However, add some booze and they will get in fights with anyone and everyone about the latest presidential candidates, controversial laws/cases, and even stereotypes about political parties.  Stay away from them unless you plan to agree with them on everything they say.  Also, be willing to just sit and listen.  You won't be able to get a word in.  Try to get a drink out of it.

2. Sloppy Suave

Add some liquid courage and this person thinks they are god's gift to the opposite sex (or same sex if LGBT).  Every guy/girl they talk to is SO into them.  Regardless if it is true or not, this person becomes uber confident and thinks they are the cat's meow.  Be careful though--if someone is blatantly honest with them that they are not interested they might become the person below.

3. Emotional Elevator*

 This person is a wild card.  They can easily go from "Why doesn't he/she like me?!" to "Who wants to partayyyy?" to "I hate everyone." to "OMG you are so fun, let's take shots." to "Wahhhhhh (sniff, sniff) who (sniff) do you (sniff) think (sniff) you are?!"  This one is all over the place.  They tend to get too drunk and is probably already a moody person to begin with.  Steer clear at the end of the night.
*Watch the video--it's pretty funny and though it may seem like exaggerated acting, it is pretty spot on.

4. Loosey Goosey

This one is predictable, but make sure you go out with more than just them.  They will always drink too much too quickly and say "I don't feel it yet" after taking 3 shots of fireball back-to-back.  This tends to be a younger person (think 21-23), but can be an older adult if they haven't figured out their limit, recently lost a ton of weight, or use booze to self-medicate.

5. Sober Shammer

This doesn't require much explanation.  This one never wants to admit that they're drunk or even close.  They tend to be someone who is always in control and is afraid to appear out of control.  Sometimes they fool well.  Other times it's just hilarious watching them try to pretend to be sober saying much more loudly than normal "I'M NOT DRUNK!"

6. Elusive Evaporator

"Where did (insert name) go?!  She was just standing next to me 2 seconds ago."  This one pulls what I call "disappearing acts".  They tend to be ninja-like in their exits often not telling anyone they had even considered leaving anytime soon.  Where these people go is a mystery because they will typically also dodge text messages asking where they went.  Are they home sleeping? Are they starting their shift at a gentleman's club? Have they been temporarily kidnapped?  Do they have to go on a secret mission for the CIA?  You never know with this person.

7. Pass-out Putz

This one may likely be friends with any of the above (especially Loosey Goosey).  They don't know how to keep up with the others, but they don't want to miss anything.  They could take a cab home when they start getting tired, but this bar stool is looking super comfortable...  Zzzzz... "What, what?  No I wasn't falling asleep."   One way to try to keep this stubborn person awake and lasting all night is a 5 hour energy or some vodka redbull drinks.  You know they won't just leave on their own so do whatever you can so you aren't carrying dead weight to the cab later.

I hope you enjoyed these.  I know these types of drunk people aren't all-encompassing, but I had to limit it somewhere.  Maybe I'll write about some of the other types in a future posts.  



Comment below about experiences you've had with these types of people. :)

Follow Your Heart, But Take Your Brain With You...Can You Catch Me?

We've all been there.  You like someone...finally!  Unfortunately, things are not panning out how you'd like it to.  What gives?

“If he’s not calling you, it’s because you are not on his mind. 

If he creates expectations for you, and then doesn’t follow through on little things, he will do same for big things. Be aware of this and realize that he’s okay with disappointing you." 

"Don’t be with someone who doesn’t do what they say they’re going to do.  If he’s choosing not to make a simple effort that would put you at ease and bring harmony to a recurring fight, then he doesn’t respect your feelings and needs. Busy is another word for asshole."--Greg Behrendt

I had to add this clip here.

If I wanted something flaky I'd reach for one of these -->

<-- I like a reliable person...like how I imagine he'd be.

I won't lie.  I also enjoyed the caption on this picture.  Ha! 

   

If you ask someone out, make a plan. One of my pet peeves is when I'm asked out on a date, and then he says to me, “So, what do you want to do?”  You're the one making the plan...so plan something!

If someone you're seeing doesn't try at all to impress you, RUN. If this is what the beginning looks like I don't want to know what comfortable looks like.

It's funny, when you're not sure if you like someone, you hear from them constantly and the second you decide you do, they fall off the earth.

Life is a roller coaster. Sometimes, it gives me whiplash and other times I just want to put my hands in the air and yell "wheeeeeeeeeeee"!

This clip isn't really related, but I've been wanting to share it for a while.

For people who do not get easily offended PLEASE watch the above video. It is hilarious! If you are under the age of 18 or older and/or get easily offended, I would not recommend watching this. Note: Although I find it humorous, I do not agree with the negative stereotypes or inappropriate behavior featured in this video.

If a Cluttered Desk is a Cluttered Mind...Then What is an Empty Desk? -- The joys of keeping it clean.

Cluttered Desk a Cluttered Mind? Click Here!

In the Workplace:

In an article in Psychology Today, cognitive psychologist David Kirsh suggested that we keep our offices the way that best suits our cognitive style. 

Messy people tend to use environmental cues to structure their time, so lots of notes and stacks of papers help them feel better connected to what they are working on and what they've accomplished.

Neat and organized people, on the other hand, rely on things like planners and to-do lists to structure their time. An uncluttered office helps these individuals better focus on what they need to accomplish.

Ellen is hysterical.  I need one of these guys.  Okay maybe I don't need one.
(I need two - haha!)

Why can't I do this with my room?  

(This is not an actual photo of my room.)

Click here for a Funny Audio Clip!

Tips for Making Housework Less Overwhelming:

Tip 1 : Time Yourself--Chances are it will take less than you think!

Tip 2: Find Your Level of ‘Good Enough’--It doesn't have to be perfect!

Tip 3: Messiest Areas First--This will give you a sense of accomplishment.

Tip 4: Prevention Is Better Than a Cure--Keep it up once you get it in shape.

Tip 5: Follow The Top To Bottom Rule--Ex: Dust before you vacuum to avoid rework. helpmeclean.com.au

More Fun Tips for Housework Here!

*This post was created while procrastinating cleaning my room.

Generation Y (Millennials) Perceptions of Dating

"Millennials are sometimes referred to as the Boomerang Generation or Peter Pan Generation, because of the members' perceived penchant for delaying some rites of passage into adulthood, longer periods than most generations before them." BookSources/9780972672702

This quote is not intended to "diss" or hurt anyone's feelings.  Instead, I added it to put the spotlight on how things are different for our generation.  The differences are not exclusive to the workforce, but also in dating.

Thank you to a certain someone who sent me this video.  It is hilarious, yet terrifyingly realistic.  You have to watch it.

“Millennials are basically getting to know one another through their smartphones,” said Green. "That creates a lack of motivation and effort. How do you create something meaningful if all you’re doing is pressing a few buttons while you’re sitting in your own space? Maybe you can create intrigue, but eventually you've got to spend quality time together in person."huffingtonpost

As someone who feels closer to others by spending quality time with them in person, I have a tendency to not respond to texts when I feel like the person isn't making an effort to see me.  I am also much more likely to get bored and/or annoyed when texting is the main venue for communication.

Kelly: Are you guys meeting about WUPHF? You know that that was my idea, right?  I said to Ryan, "I try to call you, and you don't have your phone. I try to I.M. You, and you're not online. I wish there was a way that I could do everything all at once, and I could just be like this little dog going, 'Ruff! Ruff! Ruff! Ruff! Ruff!'"  

The Office: WUPHF--> Click here to View!

I will miss The Office, but I will still find ways to include it in posts.